Getting engaged is one of the most exciting things you can experience. However, shortly after stress sets in. You start thinking about your date, dress, venue, cake, wedding party, bridesmaids gifts and groomsmen gifts, and the list goes on. It’s pretty scary but it doesn’t have to be, and you don’t have to do it alone. We’re here to help! In this blog, we’ll help you decide who, aside from your fiancé, should be standing next to you on your big day!
Give it some thought
You don’t have to decide right away. It’s actually better you don’t because once you ask there’s no going back. You don’t want to be known for kicking someone out of your wedding party, do you?
In our experience, it’s best to not just think about how close you are to someone now, but also consider the past and future. Will you still be close in five or ten years from now. Are you picking them because you feel obligated because you’ve been best friends since 1st grade? It’s also good to think about how everyone will interact with one another, especially if you’re not sure about someone.
Have clear and honest expectations
The last thing you want is to be let down by the people that are supposed to be closest to you. However, if you don’t set clear and honest expectations, that might just happen. Are you wanting them to just wear what you pick out? Do you expect them to help you stuff and address invitations? To decorate or tare down? Or are you okay with them wearing what you choose and showing up on time? Think about your expectations and clearly, honestly, and lovingly express them to your party. It’s important too to think about anyone out of town. They may or may not have different responsibilities.
Including your family is an easy way to avoid upsetting people, and they’re almost guaranteed to be there to celebrate future anniversaries. Now obviously, if you’re from a big family, you can’t include everyone. It’s probably best to just include the adults. They’ll be more responsible and able to participate in all pre-wedding events.
Don’t ask because you feel obligated
Asking someone to be in your wedding because you were in there is not necessary. Be warned, you might hurt some feelings. And if you do, just be open and honest. Explain to them that it was a tough choice and you thought it was best if you kept it to the closest people in your life now. If you do want them to be apart of the wedding but don’t want them as a bridesmaid or groom, consider giving them another role. They could read scriptures during the ceremony, usher people to their seats, or even light candles.
You don’t have to include kids
Kids are awesome, but when it comes to your wedding you don’t have to include them. It’s okay to not have a flower girl or ring bearer. On the flip side, it’s also okay to include multiple kids if you want. It’s your wedding 🙂